Personal Growth Blogs

I learned about the important of mindfulness in every day life. It's a powerful mindset to adopt and evovle over time, so you can react to a situation with a concious mind. Therefore, when things don't go to plan, you'll be able to control your reaction and not break down with stress or speak out with anger. It was interesting to read the scientific studies and results. I feel that I should start exploring mindfulness and seeing what it can offer.

It almost took the entire two minutes to achieve mindfulness, as my mind is an ongoing storage bank. I tend to not write things down and leave them to roll around in my head 24/7. Over the next few days/weeks I look forward to seeing changes here. I find it easy to achieve mindfulness during karate, as I'm away from technology and it's after class when we're all exhausted.

It laid some clear goals and plans in place. I've attempted website rebuilds in the past and it's really slow and discouraging if I'm trying to design as I go. I'd usually sink way too much time into a project and then draw something up, but it's already too late. I really enjoyed getting a solid conceptual design sorted, and then just building what's in front of me. Along the way, my requirements did change and the site felt a little different. But those changes were minor and didn't deviate from the plans too much.

Before chapter 2, I thought it would be a great concept that I can incorporate into my daily routine. After chapter 2 I learned how to meditate properly and also the benefits meditation brings to the table. I'm excited to take it for a whirl and see where we go from here.

I learned about the correct sitting postures, which all require you to be alert but calm at the same time. Meditation was compared to lifting weights at the gym (which I'm very faimiliar with) so this made it easier to understand the benefits before, during and after meditation.

The correct sitting posture really stood out to me. I do think that I'll need my eyes closed otherwise I'll be easily distracted. I also didn't realise how technical and detailed the sitting posture was.

The book is easy to read and I love how the author also speaks their mind from time to time.

I learned that listening to others is very important and benefits both parties. I tend to be a rapid fire machine when it comes to talking. This way, I say everything that I think needs to be said, and then my mind is ready to move on to the next agenda. However, this book has taught me that I need to enable others to have the opportunity to also speak their thoughts. In this situation, I need to become a better listener. It won't happen overnight, but being aware of the issue is a good first step for now.

Taking one breath a day. It's good to start somewhere, even if that somewhere is quiet small and not the end goal. I can always revisit if the need arises, and if it doesn't, I can be satisfied that I've banked my one breath of mindfulness that day.

I look forward to dedicating more of my time to listening to others effectively.

Mindfulness is about separating the mind and focusing on your existence. Picture it as if you're looking down and observing your human structure, learning from interactions and actions. Self awareness is a skill that helps you achieve mindfulness. Self awareness is about analysing what does and doesn't impact you. For example, you could say "I'm experiencing sadness" instead of "I'm sad". Instantly, after writing "I'm sad" I feel down. However, the first example "I'm experiencing sadness" gives one hope that the feeling is likely to pass soon.

I tried to journal as I felt it would be best to write everything down and I didn't want to risk sleeping during the body scan. Journaling was easy to do and really effective. It helped clear my mind from stressful situations and I feel like my concentration has increased.

This was probably the best section in the chapter to be honest. It really hit home just like day one where I learned to stop saying 'you guys', and become aware of the language I'm using. In the future I'll definitely be correcting myself and others where possible, to remember that feelings aren't who we are. Many people out there could be feeling trapped, lonely and sad. It sits on my mind that a simple change of perspective could really help them out.

When programming, one of my triggers is taking a long time to solve a problem. I tend to try over and over again, but without success. I then look back and start thinking the time invested was wasted. I've been practising to stop, take a break and come back later with a different approach. This works wonders and got me through the last two sprints without any large time sinks. I notice my seating position tends to change often, before I start to slump my posture and learn closer to the screen. Next time I change seats I'll take a moment to ensure I'm not being triggered by a problem at the time.

I've been using this already as part of the mindfulness practice. I used to get stuck in a large wirlwind of a problem and keep trying for hours on end. My first website took a day to make because of this. Now, I've learned to identify this behaviour, stop it early, take a breather and work out a fresh approach as I reflect on my work and realise the problem is either minimal, or not important.

- Pleasure: The next highs I'm chasing is completion of DevAcademy and purchasing a property of my own. I love to set an endless amount of goals and do my best to tick them all off.
- Passion: Time flies when I'm in my element at work, diagnosing technical issues and reading through code. I also enjoy finding my flow on certain games and cashing in an endless streak of victories.
- Purpose: My purpose is to provide the best life possible for my family and pets.

- My core values are honesty and caring for others.
- I stand for being open and honest to one another and understanding how actions impact other people, by placing myself in their shoes first. I also encourage others to push themselves to their absolute limits and to think positively about any hurdles in their way.

I found that I need to practice this more often to turn the failures and achievements into sensations instead of controlling moments. Failure often results in my mind searching for a solution or creating one, if a solution doesn't exist. For my successes, I usually focus through all the hard times beforehand and reel in the accomplishment. I should become more humble and see this as a sensation or experience, rather than letting it take over and control my emotions. I guess it's a balancing act really. Once I stop beating myself up for failing, the successes will probably feature less in the spotlight.

I really liked the story where Roz still completed her journey, even though the oven, oars and probably a few other things too, broke down. I've been in similar situations where I know things are going to go from bad to worse, but it's all about pushing through and never giving up. For a recent half marathon I ran, I told myself even if both of my legs break, I'm crawling over that finish line and no one can stop me.

This part of the chapter was a nice reflection as I could relate to recently getting a new boss, similar to the author. We established trust early on in our first meeting and really opened up about our current roles, goals and aspirations. Not bottling up information and being honest were the key factors. Having a little laugh every now and again helped us understand each others 'joking' style and emotions, but to also identify when something is serious and not a joke.

The questions included in the book were a bit deep, but the listening exercise went well. I think the best part was realising that I need to be an empathic listener more often. We do display empathy at work when users request new features for the software and explain why it'd improve their life. However, this exercise was more on a personal basis and deeper than what I'd usually exercise in my daily life.

Very understanding. It made me happy and put things into perspective that we're all human and we all experience the same ups and downs together.

Issue: Working across two stores, one in town and the other in Kilbirnie - rotating thoughout the week.

I could relate to this chapter well as I'm always putting other people first and I've always remained kind to others even in tough situations.

Compassionate leadership is very essential as staff will work as hard as they can for their leaders. When they're asked to do something special they'll be happy to do so. In the past I've gone over and above my duties multiple times for a compassionate boss. However, the opposite happens when under leadership that lacks compassion. Staff will become disgruntled and perform poorly in spite of the leaders. Having one negative staff member can leak negativity throughout the team and cause disruption. So it's important to be compassionate to all.

Nice and relaxing. I don't hold grudges or carry bad thoughts with me. However, this form of meditation helps improve my happiness/goodness.

I'm in a good place at the moment and there's nothing really troubling me at the moment. I found it quite hard to relate as I was scrambling to find something that bothered me. Maybe during bootcamp when life becomes more stressful I can revisit this style of meditation.

Status - I've often jumped on Slack and provided help/answers/feedback to posts. We're all in this together, so there hasn't been a status increase of any sort. Comparing against myself, I've definitely made some huge steps towards becoming a web developer.
Certainty - My job is secure during the 9 weeks of bootcamp and I'm certain my time at EDA will be a success.
Autonomy - As the first 9 weeks (18 for me) have been self lead study, including my job which is full autonomy, this will lead well into bootcamp as I know I'm responsible for my workload.
Relatedness - Everyone is my friend. Again, we're all in this together!
Fairness - I love keeping a fair playing field, I'd never cut someone else down for my own gain. I'll treat others ideas and actions fairly throughout bootcamp as it's in my nature.

I've had a few difficult conversations in the last week and they all went really well. I find I'm listening to the other person a lot more and responding in a kindly crafted manner. Any feelings or emotions tied with my response I take as experiences and don't let them impact my response.

I enjoyed reading these chapters as I believe this book has helped craft me into a better human being.